FRIKITRACKER v.3.047 (5-1-2020 02:50:04 EST)

Allows the user to connect to The Friki Ultimate Network™ and be syncronize with the 16-channel "Harmonious Frikquency."

Written in Advanced sequential Microsoft programming language Hypertext Markup Language Application (with necessary prerquisite knowledge, of course, in Hypertext Markup Language and Cascading Style Sheets), interactive VBScript and JScript to bring the FULL EXPERIENCE of FRIKITRACKER to the end user. FRIKITRACKER utilizes Microsoft component mshta.exe running in full compatibility/administrator privilage mode (see next paragraph) in order to perform strenuous Harmonious Frikquency calculations. This is to ensure that FRIKITRACKER is able to access the correct memory addresses, rather than "predictive memory addresses," which 99.99% of ALL computer software (Estimated Calculation 'E.C.' Harmonious Frikquency #12 5-18-2020 7:39:24 EST) uses. Conversely, many FRIKITRACKER users running GNU/Linux have complained that Wine has refused to interpret the Harmonious Frikquency—indeed, WineHQ AppDB lists FRIKITRACKER v.3.047 as "Garbage," although whether this is due to Microsoft's proprietary HTA library or a scared squeak of something deeper...remains to be seen...for the time being. To address this issue, the Friki Ultimate Network has developed a fork of GCC called FrikiOpenHTA, which can be compiled from source at this FrikiHub page. FrikiOpenHTA is written in C+++ and maintained by the Free Friki Foundation (FFF).

From v.0.001, FRIKITRACKER is ring 0 (kernel-level access) software. YOU are responsible for its implementation on home computers and servers (see Guymedium License for more details). In the event that you may see "Error 0: $USER$ has experienced brain death. Shutting down~~~nanoda!", a full reformat of the install drive is required. Should neither the install disk be able to be reformatted or the install partition deleted (Error 1: $USER$ cannot disconnect from the Harmonious Frikquency~~~nanoda!), the Friki Ultimate Network urges you to sell your hardware to your nearest electronics store for refurbishing. If this cannot be accomplished, you may reach Friki Ultimate Network technical support at 1-800-555-4747. A Harmonious Friknician will be dispatched to your location (currently, there are 102 Harmonious Friknicians in the continental United States). It is recommended that you remain at least ten feet from your machine until the Harmonious Friknician arrives.


[0a/b]: $USER$ has successfully connected to/disconnected from the Friki Ultimate Network~~~nanoda!

[1]: $USER$ has connected to Harmonious Frikquency (1-16)~~~nanoda!

[2]: Random number generation complete~~~nanoda!

[3]: Fortune generated~~~nanoda~

Error 0: $USER$ has experienced brain death. Shutting down~~~nanoda~

Error 1: $USER$ cannot disconnect from the Harmonious Frikquency~~nanoda~